I knew I was codependent. That relationship drama was the #1 time suck of my life and inhibited everything, including my career success. ?
I couldn’t know how powerfully the act of color coding my diary would be to shock me into reality, or that it’d do more for me than therapy ever had.
You may have heard me talk about some of this before. But reminders are powerful, especially when love is in the air and on our minds with Spring blossoms sprouting and Valentine’s Day just past.
The idea of color coding didn’t hit me right away. I’d been keeping track of our good and bad days on my computer for months. But when I couldn’t tell if our happy times outnumbered the sad, an image of color-coding my entries formed in my head. I had NO idea at the time it’d be so easy to see my romance at a glance this way, but this powerful practice changed my perspective on everything.
Colors, I’m happy to say, do not lie. I could see how much time I was wasting and it was shocking, but freeing. Blue for tears, yellow for mellow, green for romance (and later, orange for happy, and red for anger). Suddenly my confusion and misery made sense. ?A techy buddy of mine turned my log into a calendar mock up, and a year later, I’d found a team of designers and The Boyfriend Log was born.
These days, thousands of lovers (and soon-to-be lovers) use the app to stay sane, to see what’s really going on, and to know how they really feel. Many (most, in fact) use it to keep track of how good things are. The app helps them take better care of themselves and each other–and record cherished memories, too. ?
The Boyfriend Log app is FREE on the iTunes store. I hope you give it a try, or try it again if you’ve been away from it for a while. I’ve now had six years of blissful Valentine’s Days, and I owe much of my happiness to this visual representation of how I feel.
To download the app: www.theboyfriendlog.com
And! If you don’t own an iPhone (or even if you do), you can find a much cooler version of my original computer log over at www.TimeDebt.com… a site I created after talking about this topic for TEDWomen late last year. (My talk hasn’t posted yet, but I’ll let you know as soon as it does.) At any rate, there’s nothing to buy here. Just sharing tools that saved me. Because no matter how you get there, clarity is queen. And king.
To love. ?
P.S. Head over to FB if you’d like to share your experience.