It's here! My Diamond Jubilee! The day I feared would never come.

OMG, Hi! I love you! I love everything right now. It’s 5:00 a.m., and my family is all here, and I’ve been dive-bombed by six dogs (the other four are around here somewhere, still asleep), and I’ve just officially outlived my mother.

OMG. I MADE IT. I’M ALIVE. I’M SIXTY. I’VE NEVER LOVED A NUMBER MORE IN MY LIFE.

I didn’t fully realize the weight I’d been carrying until I saw my GIDDY smile. I was just now brushing my teeth after dancing to the sink from the toilet. Did I just hip-hop my bedhead? Yep. And I looked pretty fucking cute doing it, too.

“I’ve lived a long life,” my sweet, fifty-nine-year-old mama said, trying to comfort me as cancer transformed her from vital to bed-bound in weeks. Excuse me? Comparing herself to her mother, who died at forty-nine (Tuberculosis), there was apparent bargaining at play. WTF? She was far from done! With so many dreams unfulfilled and so many deathbed regrets shared, I was shell-shocked. And I was determined. I would not surrender so easily. There would be no codependency with aging or death for Joanne Tisch’s eldest daughter.

I have wrestled and wrangled my way to write a different story than Mom’s with a million “healthy” choices on every imaginable spiritual, mental, emotional, and physical level to try and stave off the inevitable. But knowing there are no guarantees, I’ve been quietly terrified I’d never see this day. And yet, I keep hearing myself say that I could die happy anytime lately.

I said it when Beautiful Writers was published.

I said it when the audiobook recently dropped.

After finally listening to the book (after getting triggered by the print version two years ago and dropping it), I said it when my son called me his hero.

Most recently, I said it after posting a trailer video for my Carmel retreats, where the images and social media comments showed me that my legacy is so much richer than I ever could have hoped for or imagined.

Of course, all I have to do is look at my people and animals to know I’d fight with the force of twelve hurricanes, not to leave them uncared for. That’s the biggest blessing of my life, something I didn’t know when I was young. My greatest joy has been being of service.

May I offer a bit of a book writer’s confessional?

For the past decade, from 50 (even earlier) to recently, I thought the most important thing I could do was finish the book I was writing. But something happened when I looked up from the page at the rest of my life. I took it all in and thought, “Holy smokes. I love my life!” As in everything other than writing.

Everything I already had. All the things I’d been missing that were waiting for me all along. That’s not to say I can separate my joy from finishing those soul-contract projects. I can’t. They’re part of my heart forever.

“There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.”

― Maya Angelou

My mother expressed this agony to me on her deathbed. Others have, too.

But my most fantastic truth is that I might love nurturing OTHER PEOPLE’s BOOKS MORE THAN MY OWN. When push comes to shove every day, I prioritize working on your books, pitching you, and promoting your stories.

I’ve had a memoir almost finished for a decade, and Beautiful Writers II nearly complete. But it’s YOUR books that get me up every day. The ones I think about before bed. The ones I cheer for more than my own.

I’ve done it. Written the best book I could want to read or write. Creatively, I could die happy.

But I hope I have many more years in community with you. You’re the real gift. Diamonds are nice and all, but collaborating with you is life.

Speaking of diamonds, sister Carolita gets pissy when I talk about dying happy. “You can’t wrap up your life yet! You’re not allowed to talk about you in the past tense!” I love how bossy and fiery she is. And I’ve got to stick around because she gives the BEST birthday gifts. Yesterday, she surprised me with the prettiest diamond earrings she bought at an estate sale for me last January and has been holding onto, with NO idea that diamonds are the Jubilee gift for 60! Did you know that? Life is magical. So, I’ll be trying out a new mantra for the coming decade. You may want to join me. Instead of saying, “I did it,” let’s go with: “I’m doing it. I am on my purpose.”